This site makes extensive use of JavaScript.
Please enable JavaScript in your browser.
Live
PTR
10.2.7
PTR
10.2.6
Beta
Treating a serious WoW addiction
Post Reply
Return to board index
Post by
join993
He's an addict, treat him like one. Let your mom understand that it's unhealthy for him! Tell her to put a timer or something on the internet. anything! At worse case, take the electric cable for his computer and hide it.. Also show her some vids on youtube about those other addicts and what happend to them, do she want him to show up on the news about his addiction?
Post by
Zmobie
I'm not an expert or anything... But after only 1 semester of Psychology, I'm pretty sure I can say WoW isn't his real problem.
I mean, it is his current problem, but not what's causing him to have a problem in the first place. If you take away WoW, he'll find something else in it's place. Whether it be Television, another MMO, hell, even books.
I would suggest seeking professional advice/help, as none of us here can tell you exactly what to do.
I'd probably suggest having both group and solo therapy, but that would be up to you and your family to decide. If his addiction to it is as serious as you say, real help is the best thing for him and you/your family.
Hope that helped.
Post by
jure12
I'm not an expert or anything... But after only 1 semester of Psychology, I'm pretty sure I can say WoW isn't his real problem.
I mean, it is his current problem, but not what's causing him to have a problem in the first place. If you take away WoW, he'll find something else in it's place. Whether it be Television, another MMO, hell, even books.
Exactly. Some time ago I wrote a
post on wowdetox
and a part of it is:
WoW didnt destroy my life... it was substitute for my already destroyed life... And a very interesting and quite fulfilling substitute too. I didnt only played because I was addicted, but because I had no desire to do anything else in my (so-called) life... It was more escape and substitute then addiction.
I don't play anymore. After 6 months of no subscription I payed it only to see that I don't have interest in it like before - but I'm still visiting wowhead! Why? This account is made out of boredom and I use it while procrastinating on real-life issues (that's why most of my posts are short and sometimes cynical). Once I get my real life back on track, there will be no reason to even type wowhead in browser.
As I said in that wowdetox
post
:
Thank you for reading. I wish u all to have a better life.
Post by
TheReal
Thanks to everyone for providing ideas and encouragement. We are pretty much set on scheduling an appointment with a therapist rather than take the game from him completely. If we can drastically reduce his playtime per day, we could allow him a little splurge on a raid day. This will probably become both single and group therapy.
I want to wish luck to everyone who read this thread and said to themselves, "hey, that sounds like me (or someone I know)." Addiction, in any of its forms, sucks.
Post by
Croco
I have to say I find some of the stuff said here really disturbing. Like the parts where the OP says "we could allow him" to play more on raid days.
In the first few pages it really seamed to me like you were trying to understand your brother and get more involved into his "coming back to life". But then all the posts "preaching" the benefits of "tough love" and "cutting off from wow" kinda got to you? Convinced you? Did you get scared or something? Why else would you want to hand the matter over to the psychiatrist?
Also, why did you leave from the realm he was playing on? Was it because you didn't want to have anything to do with his wow playing hours?
I don't know man, moving this matter over to specialized help is like saying you can't deal with it. Ever thought that this might just be a phase? Maybe it's just a break your brother needs, maybe he is gathering his "mojo" by being somebody important in this game!
Just respect his choices. If you take over and start making decisions on how it's best for him to get rid of this addiction you are not his brother, you are his father. Instead just be his friend. Friends are there for you not to judge but to take your side when your life is @#$%, and cheer with you when you are doing great.
Friends trust your judgements, they don't try to make them for you!
Just a thought for the ending. Would you be happy if he had a nice house, car, and all other stuff people "normally" surround themselves with, but still played wow? If he was on his own, had a job, somebody to come and cook and wash for him, but still used most of his free time to play, would you be OK with it? It would still be an addiction right? But then again it wouldn't be so weird because he would have all these "normal" things around him, right? And could pass as a really secluded man, but a man nevertheless.
Post by
TheReal
I have to say I find some of the stuff said here really disturbing. Like the parts where the OP says "we could allow him" to play more on raid days.
In the first few pages it really seamed to me like you were trying to understand your brother and get more involved into his "coming back to life". But then all the posts "preaching" the benefits of "tough love" and "cutting off from wow" kinda got to you? Convinced you? Did you get scared or something? Why else would you want to hand the matter over to the psychiatrist?
Also, why did you leave from the realm he was playing on? Was it because you didn't want to have anything to do with his wow playing hours?
I don't know man, moving this matter over to specialized help is like saying you can't deal with it. Ever thought that this might just be a phase? Maybe it's just a break your brother needs, maybe he is gathering his "mojo" by being somebody important in this game!
Just respect his choices. If you take over and start making decisions on how it's best for him to get rid of this addiction you are not his brother, you are his father. Instead just be his friend. Friends are there for you not to judge but to take your side when your life is @#$%, and cheer with you when you are doing great.
Friends trust your judgements, they don't try to make them for you!
Just a thought for the ending. Would you be happy if he had a nice house, car, and all other stuff people "normally" surround themselves with, but still played wow? If he was on his own, had a job, somebody to come and cook and wash for him, but still used most of his free time to play, would you be OK with it? It would still be an addiction right? But then again it wouldn't be so weird because he would have all these "normal" things around him, right? And could pass as a really secluded man, but a man nevertheless.
Your post is full of fail. I have watched his life go to &*!@ since he started playing the game. He used to have a job and friends. Because of WoW, he no longer has those things. Did you read where he lost his job because of a guild raid?
"Allowing" him to play would only be according to the guidelines of the therapist. I am sure there will be some sort of limits "set" pursuant to a healthy recovery, and the time "allowed" by the therapist is that to which I am referring.
We have had many family discussions, but nothing has ever permanently changed. The first couple days afterward are better, but after a week it's back to the same old thing. I
do
understand him. He has a problem that he refuses to acknowledge.
I moved off his realm because I did not want to feel like I was encouraging his bad habit. Simple enough to understand?
We'd like to move this matter to professional help because we
can't
deal with it; we've tried. After almost two years of "gathering his mojo," I doubt this is a phase. He's basically hit rock bottom already, and without a "normal" schedule he'll never get a job. Read that again. HE'LL NEVER GET A JOB. His WoW habits must change if he is to become a productive member of society. Hell, he could be a productive, secluded man and I wouldn't care.
I believe my actions show a genuine concern for his well-being. I can be his brother and still care about what happens to him, right?
Edit: Forgot a word
Post by
Zmobie
I have to say I find some of the stuff said here really disturbing. Like the parts where the OP says "we could allow him" to play more on raid days.
In the first few pages it really seamed to me like you were trying to understand your brother and get more involved into his "coming back to life". But then all the posts "preaching" the benefits of "tough love" and "cutting off from wow" kinda got to you? Convinced you? Did you get scared or something? Why else would you want to hand the matter over to the psychiatrist?
Also, why did you leave from the realm he was playing on? Was it because you didn't want to have anything to do with his wow playing hours?
I don't know man, moving this matter over to specialized help is like saying you can't deal with it. Ever thought that this might just be a phase? Maybe it's just a break your brother needs, maybe he is gathering his "mojo" by being somebody important in this game!
Just respect his choices. If you take over and start making decisions on how it's best for him to get rid of this addiction you are not his brother, you are his father. Instead just be his friend. Friends are there for you not to judge but to take your side when your life is @#$%, and cheer with you when you are doing great.
Just no...
Seeking specialized help doesn't mean he doesn't want to deal with it, it means he is very concerned, and doesn't know exactly how to deal with it. SO instead of doing something drastic and probably making it worse, they can go for sessions with a therapist and see where it leads.
Friends should also be there to help you. From what TheRealArkayn has said, it seems his brother really has a serious problem, therefore, it makes sense he wants to help him any way possible.
I'm sure if I knew someone in this situation I'd try to get involved and help, and I'm pretty sure you would to.
Post by
161330
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
109113
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Kibbles
Screw the computer with passwords. Password his Account (not WoW, the computer) Password the Internet (brodband if you have), Password everything and log in for him once or twice a day. Note: put in a timer if you can, so the computer boots out ever hour or so. Treat it like a drug; he needs to be 'weaned' off it slowly.
Post by
FritzTheCat
My solution is an ugly one but hear me out.
Let him crash and burn.
If he lives with his parents, (I think I read that) his parents need to turn him out of the house, especially if he doesn't have a job. A disability is no excuse, and a mother's love needs to get tough sometimes. If he doesn't live with your parents anymore, and lives alone and has to pay his own way, let him keep playing WoW until his 401k is empty and he's completely broke. It's really hard to focus on your raid schedule when there's a landlord hammering an eviction notice on your door. The bottom line is that he's 28 years old - there's a certain amount of stubborn that's entirely too deeply set in by then... a rude awakening is in order. Addicts of all kinds who recover all can recall the point they hit rock-bottom; if all else fails, the only solution is to force rock-bottom to come faster and make him face it, and pray he has the strength of character to survive it.
Post by
150826
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
264371
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Croco
Did you feel like I was flaming you? That wasn't really my intention.
I did read with attention what has been said here, and I understand that he lost his job because he stayed home and played wow. On a Sunday. It seems to me like that was the drop that filled his glass.
About the therapy thing. I am not used to that. I don't think that every little thing needs to be sorted in the terapist's office. Some matters simply get sorted by themselves, and although at the moment I am in really in your brothers shoes I know I won't be there for as long as your brother did. That I didn't knew, and I agree that 2 years is too much.
I think your actions show that you are desperate to fulfill your role as a caring brother, that's how it looks like mainly.
Post by
TheReal
Did you feel like I was flaming you? That wasn't really my intention.
I did read with attention what has been said here, and I understand that he lost his job because he stayed home and played wow. On a Sunday. It seems to me like that was the drop that filled his glass.
About the therapy thing. I am not used to that. I don't think that every little thing needs to be sorted in the terapist's office. Some matters simply get sorted by themselves, and although at the moment I am in really in your brothers shoes I know I won't be there for as long as your brother did. That I didn't knew, and I agree that 2 years is too much.
I think your actions show that you are desperate to fulfill your role as a caring brother, that's how it looks like mainly.
I'm glad we understand each other Croco. I do care about what happens to him, and as a family we have tried to make things better. We have failed apparently. It is time for a professional to step in.
If I were to say that I was influenced by any poster in particular, Norlak provided a very professional opinion in a very professional manner. Thanks Norlak.
Post by
255458
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
261226
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
237221
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
243603
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
261226
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post Reply
You are not logged in. Please
log in
to post a reply or
register
if you don't already have an account.