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Rate the joke [Forum Game]
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Post by
Interest
6/10
"Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !"
The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Bob has been missing since Friday. "
(Yes, I did get this from somewhere =D)
Post by
193410
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Interest
Heard variations of the joke before. It's not too bad.
6.5/10
Is Windows a virus?
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1. They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too.
4. Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
Post by
donnymurph
Really cumbersome, poorly conceived humour. 2/10
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve? Christopher Walken.
Post by
Adamsm
2/10
One day, a father and son were out for a walk through the park. As they went along the path, the son pointed at a pair of squirrels going at it and asked what they were doing. His father told him they were making cupcakes. The two continued down the path, and soon the son saw a pair of birds also doing it. Again he asked, and again his father answered that they were making cupcakes.
The two reached home and the boy went to bed, and the father and mother had some fun on the couch. The next morning, the father woke up to his son standing by the side of the bed. "Daddy, I know what you and mommy were doing last night." He said, a smile on his face. "Oh?" The father answered, a little worried. "Yup, you were making cupcakes!" The boy said and the father looked at him with a frown. "How did you know that?" He asked, and the boy answered "Because I licked up the icing."
Post by
donnymurph
I've heard similar. 6/10.A little boy walks in on his parents one night, and asks "Daddy, what are you doing to mummy?". "I'm putting a baby sister inside your mother, son", said the father.
The following afternoon, when the father returned from work, the little boy was sitting on the front porch, crying uncontrollably. The father came and sat next to his son and put his arm around him. "What's up son?" he asked.
"Well," said the little boy, "you know how you put a baby sister inside mummy last night?"
"Yes", the father replied, a little bewildered.
"Well today the postman came inside and ate it all up."
Post by
193410
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Interest
5/10
Fire investigators on Maui, Hawaii, USA, have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month: a short circuit in the homeowner's newly installed fire prevention alarm system.
'This is even worse than last year,' said the distraught homeowner, 'when someone broke in and stole my new security system.'
Post by
gabeo820
A gaben joke a day keeps episode 3 away.
Btw
7/10
Post by
Interest
3/10
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car is not called a racist?
^^ This blew my mind (Don't ban me).
Post by
193410
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
606231
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
193410
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Azazel
3/10
Your arena-rating.
Badum-tisch.
Post by
Interest
3/10
Your arena-rating.
Badum-tisch.
It's not funny because it was Wowbashed.
=D
5/10 though.
Q. What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
A. A tea bag.
Post by
donnymurph
7/10An Englishman, Irishman, Scotsman, Frenchman, Italian, Russian, Turkish, Chinese, Japanese, Indian, Egyptian, South African, Australian, New Zealander, Brazilian, American and Canadian walked into a bar.
The bartender looked at them and said Sorry guys, you can't come in without a Thai.
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